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Training with Marta
Marta Varee Pearson
Trauma specialist, speaker, author, and coach
DEFUSION in 5 SWEEPING STEPS
Use the following "BROOM" to sweep in a solution.
BREATH - DEEPLY, COMPLETELY:
Breathing helps one to think clearly to plan an act rather than a reaction.
Deep, slow breathing shuts off adrenaline flow which inhibits the thinking process.
REFRAME - ASK YOURSELF:
"Could this person be afraid rather than angry?"
We treat people who are afraid gently, slowly & quietly.
It's not about who they act, it's about how we respond to them.
OFFER - OPTIONS:
Provide two (2) A-B choices as options. Forego A-Z ultimatums.
A = turn the radio down or B = put on your headset.
Not A = turn the radio down or Z = turn the radio off.
Don't ask "how can I help" or "what do you want?"
If they knew they wouldn't be losing control.
OUT OF THE HEAD - ACTION:
Have them - write a list or walk with you to another area.
Movement helps bleed off excess energy and adrenaline.
Less thought - more body movement.
MODEL - BEHAVIOR YOU WANT:
Talk softly & slowly.
Ask for a positive, never a negative.
"I hear you best when you talk quietly?"
Featured in the
"Regaining Civility in an Angry World" (Religious & Community Group Settings)
"Managing Anger - Handling an Aggressive Public" (Business & Government Environments)
"Behind the Angry Mask of Bullying Behavior - Creating Safety" (Schools & Educational Systems)
MODULE 1: Behind the Angry Mask: Definitions, Trust, Anger, Fear, Anxiety
MODULE 2: Peace in Your Own Mind: Responsibility, Decision Making, Communication
MODULE 3: Effective Environmental Change
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